Blessings to all on this wonderful Lenten time!
For the past month, I have been breaking my head thinking about what I was going to "give up" or "sacrifice" during Lent. I really wanted it to be a meaningful sacrifice; something that would help me become a better person and strengthen my relationship with God. From my understanding, this
thing I am sacrificing should not be:
1) something I'm going to be thinking about for 40 days and counting down the days till Easter so I can eat/do again,
2) something meaningless that is not going to help me become a better person,
3) something that is going to interfere with my relationship with God.
Instead, my sacrifice should be something that is eventually going to help me become a better person, improve my relationship with God and hopefully along the way, my relationship with others. It should be something that I would like to continue (or at least be able to) after Lent if I feel it is really helping me become a better person...
The theme for Lent here is "Al encuentro con el Resucitado" which means " The encounter with the Resurrected." The theme caught my attention because I couldn't quite find the "sacrifice" in it. Okay, I'm meeting with God or encountering with Jesus but how is that a sacrifice? I pondered about this for a few days and finally came to the conclusion that I was taking the theme too literal, so I kind of gave up on it. Yesterday morning I thought to myself, "Damn, I haven't figured out what I'm sacrificing and Lent starts tomorrow... I really don't want it to be something stupid... I guess I have till midnight to figure out what I'm going to be giving up for Lent." I know, not very inspiring, more like torture. I just couldn't believe that I hadn't found that
one thing I want to work on for 40 days. So yesterday, I wasn't substituting for the penultimate period so I went back to the fourth grade class I help in and listened to the Religion teacher, Mrs. Turkovich's lecture on Lent. She shared a story with the students and at one point her voice became shaky and her eyes got watery. She took a pause and finished the story. It was a nice story, something about a guy on a train who talks to an older man about his problem and then it ended with something that had to do with a white ribbon. I didn't understand why Mrs. Turkovich wanted to cry but the moral of the story was about forgiveness and that in the end, there is someone waiting for you. So she then began to explain to the students that Lent isn't only about sacrificing. As a matter of fact, she became really upset when some of the students mentioned that they were giving up "chocolate" and "chips" for Lent. She asked them, "How is it possible that you are sacrificing food when there are millions of people in the world who are suffering from hunger?" She went on telling them that food, should not be sacrificed but instead, eaten in moderation. She told them that Lent was a time for forgiving, being generous, sharing, doing things that will help your relationship with God. Eating chocolate should not be given up because eating chocolate does not interfere with your spiritual life nor does it better your relationship with God. Not eating chocolate is not going to make you a better person. Maybe if you shared your chocolate or saved your money and donated it, then it can be purposeful for Lent. I really enjoyed her lecture because I didn't realize how caught up I had become in this "giving up" that I was only thinking about something physical. So after her class, I accepted that I had not found that one thing I was looking for to sacrifice and I was okay with that. I can better myself and my relationship with God by simply changing the way I do, think, feel and react to everyday situations.
Today during mass Father Jaime didn't focus on sacrifice. His homily was about being generous and giving, and not seeking attention afterwards, but simply being happy with yourself and satisfied that only God and you knew what you had done. So, hearing that Lent wasn't just about sacrifice made me feel a lot better about my decision in not sacrificing anything in particular.
When I went to Mrs. Turkovich's class again today, she gave me the story she had shared with the class. I read it to myself and I too, had to take a pause before I continued reading the story. It wasn't a nice story, it was a
wonderful one. After class S Ann Marie asked me what I did in Religion class and I told her that Mrs. Turkovich had shared a story with the students yesterday and that today she had given me a copy. I translated the story as I told S Ann Marie and in the middle of it all, I started to cry. I tried to continue but my tears just kept on falling. I was surprised that I actually cried because I didn't cry when I read it by myself. When I was done with the story, S Ann Marie agreed that it was a wonderful story and she had watery eyes herself.
I will share the story with you too.
Alguien Me Espera
(Someone is Wating for Me)
There was a young man sitting at the corner of a train, with his face buried in his hands and was quietly crying. After several stops an older man noticed the young man and approached him. The older man gently touched the young man on the shoulder and asked him what was the cause of his tears. The young man looked up and with tears in his eyes began to talk to the older man. He said, "When I was a teenager I was really rebellious and caused a lot of problems for my parents. My parents were always trying to keep me safe and trying to take care of me. But I never listened to them and always did what I wanted. One of those times I was looking for trouble, I got in a fight and unintentionally killed someone. I was trialed and sentenced for 10 years in prison. I wrote to my parents often but they never replied. Not once in ten years. So when I found the date of my release I wrote to my parents again. In that letter I gave them the date and told them that I was going to buy a one way train ticket to a place far from home. I asked my parents that if they forgave me, to please tie a white ribbon to the big tree in my hometown train station. If I saw the white ribbon, then I would exit there. But if I didn't, then I will continue on this train till the last stop." The younger man told the older man that he was crying because they were getting close to his hometown train station and he didn't have the courage to look outside the window to look for the white ribbon. The younger man asked the older man if he could do him the favor and look out the window and see if there was a white ribbon tied to the big tree and let him know if there was one. The older man agreed to look for him.
When they reached the young man's hometown train station his face was tilted down and covered by his hands. the older man looked outside the window and informed the young man that there was not one white ribbon tied to the big tree. The young man lifted his head and looked outside the window himself. When he did, he saw that all the trees had white ribbons tied to them.
Someone was always waiting for him.
Mrs. Turkovich, coalesced this story with Lent by saying that sometimes we are afraid to talk to God and ask for forgiveness. But in the end God is always waiting for us.
